I softly brush her shoulder with my fingers while we talk. Guys, how do you start physical contact with a girl you like? Have you noticed these subtle little signals?
The Hug
I hug her when we meet. It’s low-risk because if she’s not into me, she can take it as a friendly hug. How she hugs back (if she does at all) says it all. If she stiffens up, I know I’m not her type. If she hugs back warmly and tightly, it’s not a sure win yet, but at least I know she likes me.
The Screw
I have a screw in my forearm, so here’s my easy move: when the vibe is relaxed enough, I tell her about my accident (I fell off my bike, nothing dramatic), then take her hand and trace the screw under my skin with my fingers. Her reaction reveals a lot.
Oops
I "accidentally" bump into her while we’re walking. Maybe more than once. Not enough to push her over or anything—just a light, innocent touch. This usually works. Sometimes she playfully pushes back, and we end up laughing and nudging each other, which once led to a kiss.
Like a Gentleman
I find a moment to touch her back with my palm—maybe guiding her to the kitchen at a party or gently steering her if someone passes by. It’s subtle but effective, even on the street: I’ll point out a cute dog or a cool building, touch her back, and signal her to look.
The Knee
If she’s sitting across or next to me, I briefly touch her knee while telling a story. (Not mansplaining—just sharing something.) It feels like part of my natural gestures.
Fingers
When I hand her a drink, I make sure our fingers touch—and if they do, I don’t pull away. This also works if she’s showing me something on her phone—I hold the device so our hands connect. I believe hands are the most important part of the body when you like a girl and want to show it. Even a first handshake can be sensual, or a friendly high-five.
The Comb
I compliment her and gently touch her hair—there’s no better move. I don’t mess up her hair, just casually smooth it. Most girls like that. Another go-to from fall to spring is helping her with her coat and resting my hand on her shoulder.
The Question
Since I’m shy and respect consent, I ask if I can hold her hand. My friends say it’s lame, but it’s worked for me: if she says no, I get it; if she says yes, I go for it. Once I didn’t say a word—I just placed my hand palm-up in front of her. She looked, put her hand in mine, we intertwined fingers, and boom—we started dating. It was awesome.
The Message
While sitting next to her, I gently touch my shoulder to hers or my knee to hers, like it’s accidental—but I linger just enough so she knows it’s not. If she pulls away, I know I lost her; if she doesn’t, I’m on track.
Just Gently
Physical touch is key, but I’ve seen guys mess it up badly. Laughing and slapping a girl or putting a hand too aggressively on her thigh are no-go’s. My proven method is to lightly brush her shoulder with the tips of my fingers while talking—just barely touching. If she likes me, she’ll get it.
