Sometimes, after hearing something from our partner, we realize it’s not their wit we love.
Where Are We?
On our first hike together, I brought a paper map to show off my cool map-reading skills. When my fiancée unfolded it, she asked why there wasn’t a “You Are Here” marker on it. On a paper map…
Genetics
Here’s a silly example that actually made me love my husband more. When we got together, I had a four-year-old son and we later had a daughter. At a family Christmas, we were talking about how great my son was at math, and my husband proudly claimed he inherited that talent "from his side." We all stared at him for a moment before bursting out laughing. He loves my son so much, he genuinely thought the math genius came from him.
The Vacuum Bag
My ex, a 25-year-old at the time, asked me to check why her vacuum wasn’t working. The bag was packed solid with dust and fuzz—a huge, solid block. I asked when she last emptied it, and she replied, “Empty it…?” Did she think the dirt just disappears into another dimension?
Globe
My ex thought the Earth was made of water. He believed if you swam deep enough—or dove in a submarine—you’d eventually surface on the other side of the globe underwater.
The Cut
When our child was born, the doctor asked my husband if he wanted to cut the umbilical cord. He was shocked and asked, “Isn’t that your job?!” He had no idea it was a tradition.
The Potato
I told my girlfriend I love baked potatoes with the skin on. An hour later, she came in and said, “The microwave is sparking.” She’d wrapped a few potatoes in aluminum foil and microwaved them…
The Lights
We were freshmen in college when my girlfriend called me crying, saying she had tons of work on her laptop but the power was out in the whole neighborhood, so she couldn’t study. I told her to drive over to my place since I had power. She said, “You want me to drive at night without headlights?!” She thought the blackout affected her gas-powered car too.
Leaves
My ex surprised me by planting a rose bush in our garden—upside down! The roots were sticking out of the soil, and he said he thought those were the rose’s “leaves.”
No One
One summer evening, my girlfriend and I were lying on the grass watching shooting stars when she started a monologue about how strange it is that stars disappear during the day and no one knows where they go…
The Speed
My boyfriend was lovingly stroking my face when he said, “It’s so cool that your hair grows at different speeds!” I looked at him confused, having no clue what he meant—then he pointed at my bangs. This 27-year-old genuinely thought my bangs were short because the hair grows slower there.
