Gábor (32) has been in a relationship for a year and a half, but before that, he spent quite some time searching for the right one and went on plenty of dates. Thanks to that, he has a lot of experience in dating, and for this article, he shared how you can tell if a guy truly means it with you.
Constant Contact
“In my opinion, the number one sign is that he keeps reaching out and doesn’t let the conversation die. Whenever I was interested in someone, I’d text back even with the silliest reasons just to keep talking. And I definitely didn’t just reply with '🙂'; I made sure there was always something to chat about. Even when I was busy at work and had a million things going on.”
Exes and Old Flames
He says serious guys will ask if there’s anyone else in the picture who might steal you away, and of course, they’ll want to know how you get along with your ex. “If he’s just looking for fun, he won’t really care about your ex. But if he’s serious, he’ll want to know if you’re still in touch or have feelings for them.”
Another sign is that he cuts ties with past casual relationships. I had a few female friends I’d occasionally meet up with, hang out, or even sleep next to, but neither of us wanted more. When I met my current girlfriend, I ended those connections. I knew those old friendships could cause problems later, and I didn’t want to risk it.”
Introducing You to His Family
It’s also a great sign if your date suggests introducing you to his friends or family, or wants to meet your relatives. “Someone who’s only in it short-term won’t do this. They don’t want to explain to others that it’s just casual, and the news could get back to the girl. Usually, introductions happen when a guy is sure this isn’t just a fling—after all, family and friends’ opinions matter a lot. I’ve had a few girlfriends in my life, but I can count on one hand how many I introduced to my buddies.”
More Than Just a Few Weeks
“It also shows seriousness when he plans activities with you—not just saying ‘let’s meet this weekend.’ I once hesitated about a new relationship and wasn’t sure if I wanted more. When she suggested a spring trip to Prague, I didn’t say yes because I knew things could change. But with my current girlfriend, we bought summer festival tickets after three months because I was sure I didn’t want to go with anyone else. If someone plans months ahead with you, they’re definitely not after a short fling.”
How to Spot If He’s Just Looking for Something Casual
We also asked Gábor about signs that a guy is after a casual relationship instead of commitment. “For example, if you ask what he’s looking for, you probably won’t get a straight answer. He’ll say he’s just ‘going with the flow’ and ‘doesn’t like to complicate things,’ which are just polite ways of saying he’s not looking for more. But he won’t admit it because then you might walk away.”
It’s also suspicious if you only meet when he’s free, and if you reach out, he takes hours to reply. If you ask about meeting on the weekend, he won’t say why he can’t, just that he’ll get in touch if he’s free. Sometimes that might be at 2 a.m., after a few drinks, on his way home from friends. These are signs of casualness, and if you’re after a serious relationship, it’s best to see through these games.”
