Endless Possibilities
Back in the day, my grandmother looked around her village—or maybe nearby villages—to see which young men were around her age, and that was pretty much the whole pool. My mom studied in a nearby town and had more options to choose from. I moved to the capital city, where the social scene was buzzing every week, and my daughter now has almost unlimited possibilities. She’s even had a boyfriend from abroad since she travels a lot—and that’s not even counting the endless options online dating offers.
As a psychologist, I see a future where only couples who truly click and are sure they won’t find anyone better will get married.
Independence
In Texas, until 1974, a woman could only open a bank account if her father or husband signed the papers with her. That was just 52 years ago! Thankfully, in developed countries today, every woman can work, buy property, own land, and run a business—no husband needed to make a living.
So why are we surprised that fewer people are marrying when it’s no longer essential for women’s financial security?
The Choice
I believe this isn’t just a women’s decision; men also think twice about marriage when dating apps offer women endless options. And honestly, that’s a good thing—fewer marriages mean fewer divorces. Plus, many grew up in their parents’ unhappy marriages and decide as adults they’d rather not go down that road.
Why Bother?
Looking around, more relationships have women earning as much or even more than their partners. This removes the main reason women used to marry: financial security.
I’m not saying there aren’t women today who still marry hoping their husband will support them. But that’s becoming less common as women need men less and less.
Out-of-Wedlock?
Even in the 1980s, people frowned on children born outside marriage, and many couples tied the knot just because a baby was on the way. Today, no one bats an eye if parents aren’t married.
Plus, we’re having kids later and later. Our grandparents often had children at 18–20, but now most people wait until their mid to late 30s. This means more child-free years to focus on careers and personal growth.
And after 10–15 years of living and growing as individuals, marriage’s restrictions feel harder to accept, and the “paper” isn’t seen as essential. Also, more couples are choosing to be intentionally childfree—or “kid-free”—where marriage isn’t a priority.
Modernized
Marriage is an outdated institution that’s gradually fading as the world evolves. The Internet has opened up the world, spotlighted the individual, and encouraged everyone to pursue self-fulfillment.
As a result, we’re less willing to accept the constraints of a “financial, property, and life partnership” like marriage.
