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"I Compliment and Ask for Her Number" – Guys, How Do You Flirt with Women?

Szőke Angéla4 min read
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"I Compliment and Ask for Her Number" – Guys, How Do You Flirt with Women? — Relationship
In this article

"Usually nothing." Guys, what do you do when you like a girl? Have you ever asked your partner how she reacted when she fell for you?

Not Much

I’ve been rejected so harshly by girls so many times that now I only dare to meet people on Tinder, not in the "real world." If I do like someone I meet in a group, I spend the whole day daydreaming about her, planning how I’d propose, what I’d say in the wedding speech, and even picking out our kids’ names. I picture us growing old together—me as a bald, white-bearded guy, her with gray hair in a bun, living in a cozy little house.

Just Staring

I just stare at how beautiful she is, and that’s it.

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Straight Up

If I’m single, I approach her in person, look her in the eye, and ask if she’d like to grab a drink with me. If I have a girlfriend, I secretly message her on Facebook or Instagram to ask the same. If she says no, I think about her a bit while masturbating, then another beautiful woman takes her place in my thoughts.

Mixed Feelings

I scroll through all her photos on social media and try to act like a cool, mysterious lone wolf around her. Childish? Yes! Can I help it? No!

Nervous

I try to ask her out, but I get so nervously awkward that either I don’t dare approach her or I mess everything up and make a fool of myself. Once I even had a panic attack while talking to a girl! I’m grateful to live in an age with social media where you can message girls, because if I had to meet people only face-to-face, I’d probably stay single forever.

Simple

I compliment her and ask for her number (or nowadays, more likely her Instagram). I message her, invite her out, and that’s it. I don’t get why people make it so complicated.

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photo-1610901157669-9c0fb8986f8d.jpg

Overthinking

Usually nothing, or rather that’s not true—I immediately start thinking she won’t like me, that she’s too good for me and deserves better. I run through different scenarios in my head about how she might reject me: slapping me, spilling her drink on me, yelling at me, or making a disgusted face. If I dwell on this long enough, I lose interest and life goes on.

Moving On

Since I’m lucky enough to rarely like someone, but the last four times every girl I asked out had a boyfriend, I’ve gotten pretty good at moving on. I’m not the kind of confident guy who just goes for it and wins the lady. One of my friends is like that—he doesn’t care if the girl is taken; he dives in and honestly, he’s pretty successful. As he says, “If she’s single, you’re competing with every guy; if she has a boyfriend, you’re only competing with one.” But that’s him, and I’m me, and I don’t have nearly that much confidence.

The Pain

If I can’t get her out of my head, I prefer the “rip off the band-aid” approach and ask her out quickly. I won’t lie, rejection hurts, but quoting my dad: “Getting turned down stings the ego, but it doesn’t last longer than a pee.” I’ve tried to live by that mantra, and it helps keep my spirit intact when things don’t work out.

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photo-1598017194369-20943ad9ff62.jpg

Contrast

It’s both the best and worst thing in the world. When I have hope, I hug my pillow and smile. When it feels hopeless, I hug my pillow and maybe even shed a tear.

Oh No

My first reaction is, “Oh no, not again!” I’m not thrilled when I start feeling tender emotions for a woman because I know love is like a knife with a sharp handle. Then I remind myself that no matter how much it hurts, love is the meaning of life. Armed with that thought, I take a chance. If it works out, I’m in heaven; if not, I’m in hell for a few days, but I pull myself together and the whole circus starts over.

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