We asked bachelors if they’re happy without a partner.
You’re in charge?
I don’t even get the question. I’m a 35-year-old single guy—what should I regret? Not having a girlfriend who trapped me by getting pregnant, forcing me to work myself to the bone to support a child? So many of my friends went through that, so I’m super careful to avoid it happening to me. Maybe after 45, I’ll rethink this whole marriage and kids thing, but until then, no way. Life’s too good this way—free and easy.
It’s tough
I wish I knew why it turned out this way. I’m 33 and was ready for marriage and fatherhood by 24. I have a close-knit, amazing family and wanted to be a dad early to have energy for my kids—but it didn’t happen. My friends say I can’t find anyone because I’m too fixated on it, but what can I do? I’m not the type to date casually. I want the woman I’ll spend my life with and who will be the mother of my children—but I haven’t found her yet. It seems women are put off by how serious I am and my clear plans. Meanwhile, my girlfriends complain guys don’t take them seriously—go figure.
Timing
I’m 37 and just broke up two months ago with the woman I thought would be my wife. We had problems, but none that couldn’t be worked through, so this breakup really knocked me down. I planned my life with her, and the thought of starting over with someone new feels overwhelming.
Already too late
I’ve never been a serious guy, but now that even my last buddy is married and they tease me for being the last single guy in the group, I admit: the idea of settling down is starting to sink in. I’m 36, and my mom’s right—what am I waiting for? Do I want to start looking for a partner as a middle-aged “old man”? No way. By now, I should at least have school-age kids. I need to step it up because I’m already behind.
The work
I don’t have a girlfriend because my last breakup opened my eyes and made me realize I need to change. If I want a healthy relationship, I have to work on myself first.
Regret
I recently realized I found "the one" when I was 25—her name was Hanna—but I let her go because I foolishly felt I still wanted to "live life." Since then, I’ve had many girlfriends, but none came close to Hanna. I’ll never find another woman like her, and she’s been married for years with two beautiful kids. It breaks my heart to think those could have been my children.
No, no, and no!
Learning from my friends, I have no intention of getting married or having kids. Somehow, none of them seem happier as husbands and dads than they were as single guys. So thanks, but no thanks—I’m good like this. (They’re actually jealous of me and always warn me not to end up like them.)
Always looking for better
When I’m with a woman, I always feel like I should keep looking because there must be someone better out there. I know it’s a toxic mindset, but I can’t help it—it’s always on my mind. I’m sure this is why I’ll end up alone forever or settle desperately for the worst partner.
Unbelievable
I’m tall, active, not ugly, and have a good job. I don’t have bad habits, I’m not weird—I’m a totally normal guy and for some reason, I can’t find a decent woman. My overweight buddy has a gorgeous girlfriend. My lazy, unemployed brother-in-law is dating my amazing sister. My brother’s a pain, but his girlfriend is a sweetheart. Why did they find partners and I didn’t?!
Awareness
I’m not obsessed with needing a wife, but I keep my eyes open. Here’s my approach: I’m waiting for someone who’ll sweep me off my feet enough to put a ring on it, but until then, I’m cool with casual relationships.
