"With this"
I'd been seeing this guy for a while, in a "friends with benefits" kind of way. Things were going well, and I felt we were getting closer—he even stayed for breakfast sometimes, or we'd watch a movie after dinner. One day, I suggested we go to the movies. He looked at me and said, "You know I won’t be seen in public ‘with this’— and he gestured to my body.
A Joke
When I had a miscarriage, my male doctor told me not to cry because "making babies is the best part anyway."
Nothing Worse
I'm 48, and at my niece’s wedding, two young guys sat at our table. One complimented my hairstyle, so I asked why. He said it’s better when older women have short hair because “there’s nothing worse” than seeing a beautiful cascade of hair from behind, only to realize it belongs to a woman over forty. He said it with such disgust that my throat tightened.
Body
My ex told me my body was both "over- and underdeveloped", referring to my 178 cm (5'10") height and A-cup breasts. Later, he even said my upper body looked like two pills placed on an ironing board.
The Question
I was dancing at a club when a guy came over. He watched me for a while and danced next to me, then leaned in and asked if I had a boyfriend. When I said no, he replied, "No wonder…" and walked away. He wasn’t even good-looking! Another “gem” from a stranger was when a man told me my forehead was so big a helicopter could land on it.
Dating
I matched with a guy on Tinder who messaged me saying my face looked like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s, then immediately blocked me. (He only swiped right to say that.) Another older man wrote that I might look good if I learned how to apply makeup really well.
The View
The first time I was with my EX husband after our third child was born, he said after so many babies, he could see straight to my heart when looking at my vagina, and when I was on top, he could only watch my belly “waving” instead of my breasts.
Bold
I’m a teacher with an eighth-grade class. One day I wore one of my nicest dresses, and a male student commented, "Wow, teacher, that’s a bold choice…" I never wore that dress again.
Weight
My dad told me not to order the high school class photo because he wouldn’t show anyone how big his daughter was. Ten years later, I told my husband I had a toothache and needed to see a doctor, and he said, "Why? So you can eat even more?" He also bought me birthday clothes three sizes too small to "motivate" me to lose weight.
Kind Words
My ex—who knew I was adopted—said if I left him, no one would want me, just like my birth parents didn’t want me as a baby. He added that my foster mother died because she couldn’t stand me anymore.
