It’s well known that doctors often downplay women’s pain and dismiss their symptoms, but these stories still surprised us. Don’t try to copy them—many are unethical—but it’s eye-opening to know they happen!
The Diagnosis
For years, I told my doctors I thought I had an autoimmune disease because I researched and matched all the symptoms. They dismissed me and laughed it off, calling me an "internet doctor," but nothing changed and my symptoms persisted. Since I started telling them I wanted a child with my (nonexistent) boyfriend, suddenly they sent me for tests—and guess what? It turned out I really do have an autoimmune disease!
The Secret
I stopped telling gynecologists I’m a lesbian (even though I think it’s important they know) because I got tired of how they treated me afterward. They’d take it almost as a personal insult that I’m not attracted to men, so I never felt taken seriously or listened to. My mom, from her own experience, advised me to say I’m trying to get pregnant. I tried it, and miraculously, the doctor immediately sent me for a test I’d been asking for years.
The Trick
I never wanted children, but my gynecologist always scolded me and asked during visits, “When are we having a baby?” So I started fibbing that I’d changed my mind and want a child someday. Since then, she’s been much more helpful and kind. Until I hit menopause, this is what I’ll say—I want a baby.
Fertility
My whole life, they told me I was anemic. The moment I said I wanted a baby (which was true), they suddenly found the autoimmune disease I have. I was never anemic.
The Attitude
Out here in the countryside, everyone knows the doctor won’t take you seriously unless you say you’re having fertility issues. I spent a year going from doctor to doctor, and they just shrugged. But mention the “baby project,” and suddenly they do everything they can to help—it’s outrageous.
The Pill
I was on birth control and knew something was wrong with my body, but no one cared—they said it was probably stress. Once I said I wanted a baby, they suddenly examined me more thoroughly and found a fast-growing tumor on my cervix. I don’t want to think about what would’ve happened if it hadn’t been caught in time…
Family Comes First
My sister had three kids and didn’t want any more, but doctors ignored her complaints despite serious pain since her last child was born. After a year, she got fed up and told her gynecologist they desperately wanted a fourth baby but couldn’t conceive. Suddenly, they discovered something was wrong with her uterus causing the pain.
My Husband
Speaking from experience, it’s even more effective to say your husband really wants a child. You might be doubled over in pain and ignored, but if your partner wants a baby, they’ll move mountains for your health. It’s shocking how little women’s lives seem to matter.
Age Difference
I had problems after giving birth that fell on deaf ears with the doctor. I was still breastfeeding but told them I wanted to get pregnant as soon as possible to avoid a big age gap between my kids. The system kicked into gear immediately, and they quickly found out what was wrong.
An Insider’s View
I’m a nurse, and I always secretly advise women to say they want a baby—doctors take them much more seriously. Unfortunately, for lesbian women, I have to say it’s better not to share that info with the doctor; it’s just not worth it.
