A sibling can be a blessing, but in the following stories, it turned into more of a curse.
I’m worried
I have two sons. When they were little, they fought and argued a lot, but once they turned 12 and 14, to my relief, they became friends. That peace lasted only a few years, because by 18 and 20, they truly hated each other again. I thought it would pass, but it didn’t. Now they’re 30 and 32 and still won’t speak to each other, refusing to even share the same space.
At family gatherings, we have to schedule their arrivals separately because the moment they see each other, the atmosphere turns icy and one of them leaves immediately. I’m deeply worried about what will happen if this lasts forever. We’ve tried everything with their dad, but they won’t even sit down to talk. I try to make them understand that when we’re gone, they’ll need each other, but they won’t hear a word of it.
Behind Bars
My sons got into a fight inside the house and when I sent them outside, it continued on the street. One hit the other so hard that his nose broke immediately and blood poured out. Then, bloody, he walked over to his car, got in, and deliberately ran over his brother with a heavy acceleration. Luckily, the injuries were minor, but I still have nightmares about it.
Deliberate Drama
My sister and I have always been best friends, so I never understood why my daughters, Lilla and Bea, hate each other so much. Lilla came to Bea’s wedding, got drunk, caused a scene, and knocked over the cake—it was awful. Bea waited and got her revenge years later at Lilla’s son’s christening. When the priest was sprinkling holy water on the baby’s head, Lilla loudly launched into a monologue, saying it was a miracle the crosses didn’t spin when she entered the church because there’s no woman as vile as her in the world, and so on...
Finally, relatives had to escort her out as she was shouting uncontrollably. I don’t know what I did wrong or what I should have done differently raising them, but I think it’s too late now. It’s a constant nightmare.
At a Loss
My daughters are two years apart and until two years ago, they were best friends. I don’t know what caused their relationship to sour, but love turned into deep hatred within months. Now they’re 11 and 14 and it’s impossible to have them in the same house. They annoy each other, there’s yelling, door slamming, crying, and often fighting every day.
The first professional told me to only intervene if they physically fight, but that didn’t help—nothing changed. Another child psychologist advised me to “keep them separate,” but that’s impossible in our apartment, and then they got jealous when I spent more time with one than the other.
Finally, I took them to couples therapy (Couples therapy isn’t just for spouses—it can help siblings, relatives, and friends too) but they just argued there, and continued fighting on the way home and at home. I’ve read every book on the subject and tried everything suggested, but nothing improved. Now I’ve accepted it and hope that when they’re older, they’ll find their way back to each other. I just hope I don’t lose my mind in the meantime.
Fatal Rivalry
My sons have competed their whole lives, in everything. They’re just a year apart, so they were in the same class in elementary and high school. They competed in sports, academics, “coolness,” everything. I don’t remember ever seeing tenderness or kindness between them—I don’t think it ever existed. They only saw each other as competition, which I accepted, thinking at least it motivated them to do better.
Then they went to college and fought over a girl they both fell for. The girl chose my older son, so one night the younger son went to her place, rang the doorbell, and stabbed his brother as soon as the door opened. My older son needed life-saving surgery but thankfully survived. He will never be fully healthy again, and my younger son is currently in prison.
