The Mirror
When I was 16, my mom used to complain when I begged her to let me get an eyebrow piercing. She shook her head at my spiky black hair and gothic makeup, and I was boiling inside, wondering how she could be such a stubborn old-school type. Now my daughter is 16 and begging for a tattoo, wants to get her lips filled (because she thinks her lips are too thin to live with), and is already saving up for a nose job.
Rebellions
I remember how much my mom annoyed me in high school when I came home and she bombarded me with questions, while all I wanted was to flop onto my bed and drift off into my own little world. It always frustrated me why she wouldn’t give me space and why her probing felt suffocating.
Now I have two teenage daughters, and I barely dare to talk to them. When I do muster the courage to ask how their day went or if their geography test went well, they snap at me to leave them alone—just like I did back then.
Criticism
I used to criticize my mom about her weight, and now it’s my turn. My daughter makes daily remarks about my figure. “Mom, how do those pants even fit you? If I were you, I’d ditch the chocolate…”
Eye Rolls
I was a late child—my parents were 35 when I was born—and I remember thinking they were old-fashioned fuddy-duddies my whole life, especially as a teen. So much so that I promised myself I’d be a young mom—and I was!
But if I thought having a baby at 23 would protect me from being embarrassing in my child’s eyes, I was way off. If I laugh a little too loudly, try to crack a joke, or dress any certain way, my 12-year-old son gives me such eye rolls and crushing looks that I feel ashamed. I’ve realized no matter your age, if you’re a parent, you’ll always be totally uncool in your teen’s eyes.
Sharp Tongue
My mom used to say my remarks were sharp, and I’d snap back that she was too sensitive. Now my teenage daughter returns the favor with zingers that sting—but when I point it out, she just laughs.
Outfits
Mom wouldn’t let me wear miniskirts and tights in winter, so I’d put on jeans, go to my friend’s house, and change there before going out. When I wore low-rise pants, she warned me I’d catch a kidney chill and regret “being sexy” when I was 40.
I always found that monologue exhausting, and now I’m the one repeating it weekly. I explain to my 17-year-old that she can’t wear thin leggings and ballet flats in winter. I argue with her to put on a shirt because she can’t go to school in a crop top that shows her belly.
Dinner
I hated having dinner with my parents. I never understood why they didn’t get that I needed time to study, chat, write in my diary, watch movies, listen to music, draw, and gossip with friends—there was no time for boring old folks at the table.
Now dinner is the only time my child is willing to spend a little time with me, though they still resent me because phones are banned at the table. (They’d rather watch TikTok videos while eating, but I don’t allow it.)
Those 15 minutes are the maximum my grumpy teenage daughter is willing to give me. Sometimes I feel like crying because of how she talks to me, but I hold myself back.
Too Late
Sadly, my mom passed away when my kids were only 5 and 8, and now I’d call her every day to apologize for my teenage behavior. My son is 15, my daughter 18, and honestly, they’re unbearable. I can’t wait for them to grow out of this phase because I don’t know how much longer I can handle the way they treat my husband and me.
What Goes Around Comes Around
When I ask my kids if they want to do something together on the weekend, they respond with the same disdainful sigh I gave my poor mom when she wanted to go somewhere with me back then.
Back then, I thought she was a strict parent, but looking back, my mom was more patient and forgiving with me than I am with my kids. It’s amazing how karma gives everything back…
Too Much?
Even at 30, I thought it was over the top when my mom shared what she went through during my puberty, but now I beg her forgiveness because I get it all back tenfold from my own daughter. Mom, please forgive me—I understand everything now.
