Nowadays, growth is not an option but an expectation. A trend that, if you don't follow, you almost have to feel ashamed. Society suggests that if you are not moving forward, you are falling behind. But the truth is, you can't always, and you don't always have to, improve. Sometimes it's enough just to breathe, to survive.
Survival ≠ Failure
Many feel that if they barely make it to the end of the day, that is already a failure. If you don't have your 5:30 AM yoga, journaling, 3 liters of water, and 10,000 steps, then something is broken. But there are times when growth is not the goal, but survival is. When all that matters is that you got up, cooked something for yourself, or simply didn't cry. This is not weakness; it is human and perfectly okay.
Growth Mania and Burnout Go Hand in Hand
The "self-improvement" culture can easily turn into self-exploitation because the constant desire to improve is exhausting. Especially when trauma, anxiety, depression, grief, or the difficulties of becoming an adult weigh on your shoulders. At those times, you don't need the next goal, but a big hug and peace.
Growth mania also makes it harder to stop and just exist. Because if you’re not growing, then what are you doing? Wasting your time? No. You’re recharging. Healing. Breathing. That is also "doing."
The Other Face of Growth: Rest
We often forget that growth is not only measured by what we visibly achieve, but also by what we let go of. Maybe you didn’t learn Italian this year, but you learned not to get into toxic situations. Maybe you didn’t make it to the gym, but you finally went to a psychologist. That is growth too. Just quieter, less "postable," but much deeper.
Don’t Feel Less Just Because You’re Not Moving Forward Right Now
Life is cyclical; there are active and passive periods: sometimes you run, and sometimes you stop for water. Neither is better than the other. You are not a robot who must always be productive; you are human – and being human means sometimes just surviving the days. And this is not a sign of failure but rather of humanity.
One of my very dear colleagues used to say before every deadline, "Rest up for it!" And she was right because those few hours of relaxation really helped when there was an opportunity. The same can be true for growth. Before you reach the next step or take the first step, it’s perfectly fine to gather some strength.
It is also true for mental health that growth is not a straight upward line but more like a wave with deeper and higher points, sometimes setbacks are possible, but stagnation too. So don’t worry if a week ago you could say no without problems, and now you feel anxious about it again.
If you’re currently in a period when growth isn’t happening, don’t blame yourself; you are not less because of it. Sometimes the greatest courage is not to jump over something but to allow yourself to rest. Survival is not the opposite of growth; sometimes it’s its antechamber.
