Unfaithfully
"Honey, you know I would never cheat on you!" Tens of thousands of women and men believe this daily from their partners, even when deep down they know it’s not true. Even if they didn’t answer their phone all evening, hide their phone, wear aftershave scent on their blouse, or have lipstick on their shirt collar: if the loved one explains it away, we believe them because we want to believe.
If I Could, So Can You
I love it when an influencer, athlete, actor, singer, or any celeb says, “If I could do it, so can you!” I find myself yelling at the screen, “No, unfortunately not!” Just because it worked for you doesn’t mean it will for me. What nonsense…
Optimism
"Everything will be fine." Really? Even though things have been getting worse since Covid…?
How Are You?
"Thanks, I’m fine." That’s the answer 99% of people give. Do we believe that 99% of people are actually fine? No. Would we want them to explain how they really feel? No, because we all have our own struggles. That’s why we lie about it—we don’t want to burden others with our problems. Imagine if someone asked how we were and we started with, “Well, I didn’t sleep well because my kid has a cold—and is having trouble at school—my mom is nagging again, my partner and I keep arguing, my boss is on my case, and my leg has hurt for weeks but I haven’t had time to see a doctor.”
Questions and Answers
“What’s wrong?” millions of men ask their partners daily. “Nothing,” women reply, which is obviously a lie. Yet most men choose to believe it and don’t press further... and for good reason—they’d unleash an emotional storm on themselves if they did.
The Partner
“Everyone has a soulmate.” Well, in my circle, no one really does. Some have spouses they don’t leave because of kids, business, or assets. Others are stuck in relationships they’ve grown tired of and haven’t found better. Those who seem happy (though who knows what’s behind the scenes) work hard to keep their bond alive. I’ve never seen a couple after 10–20 years together look at each other with misty eyes and be effortlessly happy—so much for soulmates.
Size
“Does my butt look big in these pants?” — No, not at all.
The Key to Happiness
“Money can’t buy happiness.” That’s the saying, and David Lee Roth, the rockstar, once said: true, I can’t buy happiness with money, but I can buy a yacht big enough to get close to it. Money might not solve everything, but it does create security, comfort—which brings peace—and opportunities, all of which contribute to happiness.
The Wounds
“Time heals all wounds.” Some traumas fade with time, but not every personal tragedy fully heals. For me, therapy helped me process my mother’s death after twenty years. (Her absence still hurts, but it no longer defines my daily life.)
Belief
“You can be anything if you just believe!” Well, I have a colleague with dwarfism who’s a huge NBA fan but never had a chance to become a basketball champion. My sister wanted to be a singer but doesn’t have the voice. I wanted to be a race car driver but didn’t have a car and only learned to drive at 18. The mind is powerful, but not every dream comes true just because we believe in it.
