The Age of Questions
My daughter is fixated on death. She asks things like, if the bridge we’re crossing suddenly collapsed, how many people would die. Or if there are sharks in the ocean and how many people they’ve eaten. When we splash in Lake Balaton, she wonders how many people might drown that day. She spots a ferry and wants to know how many would perish if it sank.
Why?
My four-year-old daughter, who had been potty trained for a long time, recently started peeing beside her bed on the floor in the mornings. She spent a week at her grandmother’s this summer and pooped in the garden—we have no idea why. My son, when I scold him, has started making rude noises. He learned how to "snick" and lately spits everywhere after me, which makes me want to sink into the floor from embarrassment.
Girlfriend
My 16-year-old daughter, who until six months ago was only interested in boys, has started dating a girl. I’m not homophobic, but I find it a bit surprising—I think she might be exploring her curiosity. Should I treat her girlfriend like a boy and not let her stay over, or should I act like it’s just a normal girlfriend?
Irritable
My 11-year-old daughter criticizes, insults, and barks at anyone who’s even a little different from her. Everything and everyone annoys her to death—she’s like a grumpy old lady. She behaves terribly, even though her dad and I have never set that kind of example.
Political Views
My daughter has become interested in history and is convinced our family is a "fascist dictatorship" where she has no rights. I told her we live in a strict democracy at most, and what she wants—anarchy—will never happen here.
Little Lies
My three-year-old daughter has started lying to get out of things. She comes up with the funniest excuses, like saying I can’t comb her hair because she doesn’t have a head, or I can’t put socks on her because she’s a box and boxes don’t have feet. It’s adorable and funny now, but I can’t wait for her to outgrow this phase because I won’t be able to keep playing along much longer.
Tucked In
My 15-year-old tall, slim son has recently started wearing socks with sandals and tucking his pants into them. I told him he looks like a pirate with two peg legs. The problem is, no one else has commented, so he thinks it’s just me who finds it weird.
Oh No
My four-year-old son loves Minecraft and constantly begs me to play while he watches. But he tries to get me to do some pretty intense things, like laying down rails, putting villagers on them, and building a machine to run over and kill them. He wants to kill every character in some creatively disturbing ways, and it’s starting to worry me.
Dominance
My 15-year-old son is determined to "dominate" me, the head of the family, because he sees himself as the alpha male who must take charge. He provokes, picks fights with everything I say, and talks down to me. Once, he pushed me so hard I had to grab him and pin him down. My wife was upset that I was rough with him, but now she’s in the hot seat too: my son has convinced his sister to "make their mom submit." We don’t know how to handle these two aggressive kids yet, so for now, we’re holding on and hoping they’ll outgrow it...
Hygiene
My teenage son is in that phase where he doesn’t want to shower every day. He’s not little enough to be told what to do, but not old enough to care about impressing girls. The problem is, he’s active in sports and still won’t shower when he comes home sweaty. His mom and I have told him he smells, but he just ignores us. How do you get a teen boy into the shower? I’m really looking forward to when he starts caring more.
Opening photo: Halfpoint/istockphoto.com
