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"I'm Extroverted, and I'm Done Feeling Ashamed"

Barbara Lee3 min read
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"I'm Extroverted, and I'm Done Feeling Ashamed" — Lifestyle

In recent years, it’s become a real trend for everyone to try to fit themselves into a personality type. A quick online quiz, a few questions about our social habits, and suddenly we’re labeled introverts, extroverts, or somewhere in between. Social media is full of posts where people proudly declare, “I’m an introvert, and I’m proud of it!”—which, if you think about it, is a bit ironic considering what introversion really means.

There’s nothing wrong with talking about these concepts—in fact, it’s great that differences in social behavior are becoming more accepted. The problem is how the conversation has started to put introversion on a pedestal while quietly but consistently undervaluing extroverts. As if quietness automatically means depth, and energy means superficiality.

Simply put: introverts usually recharge by being alone, while extroverts thrive in company. One group turns inward, the other outward. That’s it. Neither is better or worse, just different.

Yet today, when someone says, “I’m extroverted,” many immediately translate that to “probably shallow, loud, and self-centered.”

I’m extroverted.

I love being around people, chatting, laughing, meeting new faces, listening to stories, and sharing my own. Social settings don’t drain me—they inspire me. After an evening spent talking with friends or strangers, I wake up the next morning buzzing with ideas, thoughts, and energy.

Still, in recent years, I’ve often felt like I should be ashamed of this.

Introversion suddenly became "cool" in social media and pop culture. The quiet, bookish type became the new intellectual ideal, while extroverts often get boxed into the “superficial, social, but empty-headed” stereotype. As if loving company excludes depth. As if loud laughter and a need for attention automatically mean foolishness.

But just because I enjoy being with people doesn’t mean I can’t dive deep into a book, a thought, or a meaningful conversation. I’m not shallow—I’m open.

Just as introverts aren’t misanthropic loners—they simply connect differently.

The problem isn’t that we’re different; it’s that we’ve created a hierarchy out of those differences.

Extroverts are often misunderstood. People think we’re always seeking company because we can’t stand being alone. They assume constant talking hides insecurity or shallowness. But for us, it’s not an escape—it’s how we exist. For example, I don’t enjoy company because I fear solitude; I feel truly alive when I’m with others. Connection isn’t a substitute for me—it’s a source of strength.

So no, I’m not apologizing for being loud, for loving to tell stories, or for getting excited about people and ideas. I won’t say sorry for making others laugh or happily sharing my life.

Extroversion isn’t a disorder to fix or a weakness to hide—it’s just as valid a personality trait as introversion.

It’s time to stop criticizing one type or the other and start accepting: the world works best when both are present. The quiet and the loud, the inward and the outward, the thinkers and the energizers together create the dynamic that makes life truly livable. And yes, extroverts are needed—otherwise, how would any conversation start if no one spoke first in the silence?

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