As a photographer, you witness a lot—especially if you specialize in weddings. Experts often notice interesting details, just like in these ten cases.
1. Money
I once photographed the wedding of a friend of my mom’s. There were loads of guests, a fancy venue, tons of flowers, and a four-tier cake. The father of the groom had a few drinks and bitterly mentioned that the entire cost was covered by the bride’s family, and the groom refused to pay a single cent. That’s definitely a red flag.
2. The Puppet
One of the most common scenarios is the “puppet” groom—meaning he’s just a prop at the event. The bride runs the show, barking orders at the mother of the bride, bridesmaids, waiters, musicians, and even me, the photographer. It’s all about her, and everything must go exactly her way. The groom is just a living decoration.
3. Familiar Faces
When you notice the wedding guests barely hiding their mocking smiles because the bride or groom is attending their nth wedding, you realize these relatives won’t shed a tear when the couple says “I do” again.
4. Touching Words
When the groom’s best man kicks off dinner by joking that no one ever thought “this skirt-chaser” would settle down, haha. Nine times out of ten, these couples divorce within two years after the wedding. Surprise, surprise—the ladies’ man didn’t turn into a family man.
5. Finally
When the bride’s friends and family visibly breathe a sigh of relief and celebrate that she’s finally “off the market.” In these cases, the groom is never truly enthusiastic, because it’s clear the marriage was forced on him, and he never intended to commit.
These marriages usually last only a few years; the man always leaves sooner or later.
6. One-Sided Love
When one partner—whether the groom or bride—looks at their other half like they’re the center of the universe and their true love, while the other treats them like air. This is always a sad sign. Whether the groom can’t wait for the charade to end so he can start drinking with his buddies, or the bride treats the wedding like her personal beauty pageant or prom queen contest. I always know these couples won’t stay together.
7. The Exes
When an ex shows up at the wedding, it’s never a good sign. A colleague once told me she saw the bride drunkenly kissing her ex behind a bush during the party. My story was that the groom’s ex caught the bouquet. The groom’s friends cheered and chanted the ex’s name, and the bride nearly broke down in tears. A year after the wedding, the husband called me to ask if I’d photograph his wedding again—he was divorced and about to marry his ex.
8. Showing
When a couple says their vows with a big baby bump, but the mood among guests feels more like a funeral than a celebration.
9. Stories
I’ve had some stories… Once, the day after the wedding, the groom called asking me to delete any photos where he was staring at a female guest’s backside. Another time, after cutting the cake, the groom whispered to the bride not to eat too much because she’d gain weight.
One of my “favorites” was overhearing the mother of the bride telling a guest she couldn’t wait to make the bride’s life miserable.
10. The First Meeting
I can usually tell if a wedding will succeed from the very first meeting. For example, when the bride is wildly enthusiastic, but the groom-to-be is glued to his phone, barely responding. When a man is that disinterested, it almost always ends in divorce, because the woman won’t tolerate it long-term.
