Some days, just getting through is the goal. Being a parent isn’t easy, especially when we don’t open up about the challenges.
Love and Joy
Loving your child doesn’t mean you enjoy every moment of motherhood, and that’s totally okay. There are good days and days when survival is all you can manage. Sometimes we cook dinner and sit down to eat together, chatting like in the movies (rarely, at least for us). Other times, I let it go and don’t mind if they have cereal before bed, as long as I can finally crash. And that’s perfectly fine.
Emotional Regulation
I knew being a mom wouldn’t be easy, but I didn’t expect it to be this hard. Few admit it, yet this truth touches every new parent. Parenting demands endless patience and strict self-control—constant monitoring of our behavior and emotional reactions. (A nicer way to say we try not to explode or yell at our kids.) Emotional regulation is tough when a tiny human tests your limits every single day.
The Psychology of Judgment
No one prepares you for how judgmental other parents can be. Every woman naively believes she’ll find comrades in other moms, only to be shocked when they deliver the harshest critiques, the most pretentious attitudes, and the coldest stares. If this happens, remember this attitude stems from their own insecurities and isn’t really about you. Every parent is full of doubts, no matter what they show the world.
Trigger
Kids trigger emotions in you like no one else ever has. You thought your mom, sibling, or husband could get under your skin the most, then the kid arrived, who can send your blood pressure soaring over 200 with just a word, gesture, or look. Don’t blame yourself—it’s not because you’re a stressed-out mom. It’s because little ones mercilessly bring up our own childhood wounds like no one else. It’s not advertised, but parenting is basically a deep exposure therapy—and the best part? You don’t even have to pay for it, yay!
Healthy Self-Care
Having a child doesn’t mean you stop being you. So if you crave some personal space or free time, it doesn’t mean you’re selfish. Every mom needs time with friends, a hair appointment, a relaxing treatment, or to enjoy a hobby or workout if she wants. Parenthood doesn’t mean your identity is only motherhood—no matter what the supermom propaganda says, that’s not healthy.
Cut Yourself Some Slack
Be kinder to yourself because whatever you think, you’re doing way better than you realize. Just reading this shows you care and want to be a good parent—even on the days you feel like you’re not. Don’t buy into other parents’ perfect facades or feel guilty for not being like them. Trust me, they’re not as carefree as they seem. Recently, at a baby shower, I silently admired a mom of four who seemed cheerful and put-together. When I mentioned it, she laughed and said she still doesn’t really know what she’s doing with parenting and that morning she cried for five minutes hiding in the pantry. Every mom struggles with the same things as you, so relax: you’re not alone.
