"I don’t cook in the evenings," she said. At first, I didn’t understand why this was such a big deal—she said it with a mix of seriousness and excitement that left me a bit puzzled. You should know, Dóri was one of the cool girls back in school, a real go-getter who tried everything. After graduation, she lived abroad for a long time, soaking up life—she worked as a tour guide in Crete, became a fitness champion in Italy, even sang in a bar—I can’t even keep track. Then she hit her thirties, settled down, got married, and quickly had two little boys.
I never really pictured Dóri as a mom or homemaker before, but—strangely enough—it suits her perfectly, and like everything else, she throws herself into it 100%.
Whenever I visit, the kids are dressed in clean clothes, the house is spotless, and the garden looks perfect. Dóri herself always looks like she just stepped out of a magazine—perfect hair, flawless nails matching her stylish outfit, and she doesn’t know the meaning of sloppiness. She’s the head of the parents’ committee at the kindergarten and, on top of all that, she works. I never understood where she got all that energy.
But now I found out even her reserves have limits. She told me that since her second child started daycare and she went back to work, 24 hours in a day just aren’t enough.
Image source: Kryzhov/depositphotos.com
She wakes up early to start her mornings with a run—something I can’t even manage as a single person working from home—then makes breakfast for the kids, gets herself ready, and heads to work. (Her husband takes the little ones to daycare.) In the afternoon, she picks up the kids, they shop together, and as soon as they get home, she starts cooking. Her husband comes home later and plays with the kids while dinner is being prepared. Then it’s eating, quick baths, and bedtime—only to start all over again the next morning. I told her just hearing this was exhausting.
"Right?!" she laughed. "That’s why I decided to give something up—because by working so hard in the kitchen, I was missing out on the most important thing: evening playtime and togetherness."
She said she first dared to try just one evening without cooking—to see what would happen if they had a quick but healthy sandwich for dinner instead. Of course, the world didn’t end. That experiment stretched into more days—sometimes she picked up ready-made meals on the way home, other times she threw together simpler dinners.
At first, she felt guilty because she remembered her mom cooking every night, but the time she gained by skipping cooking made up for it so much that she no longer feels bad.
"By not cooking or just making something simple, I gain at least an hour every evening. An hour I can spend with my kids. Before, while my husband played with the boys and I was stuck in the kitchen, I always felt like I was missing out. When I heard them laughing in the living room during playtime, I thought I should be there with them, not by the stove."
Dóri says her family hasn’t really noticed that there’s not always a cooked meal in the evenings anymore. She knows cooking at home is more economical, but she sees no problem with buying a cooked meal once a week, going out for dinner sometimes, and having healthy cold platters or sandwiches the other nights.
She claims it’s not much more expensive this way, and the convenience and ease it brings to her life make it totally worth it.
"Every weekday evening, I get to spend quality time with my kids—something that used to just mean feeding and bathing them. And since I don’t have to cook every day, I’m more excited to try fun new recipes on the weekends. A kid is way happier with a rested mom who spends time with them at night than with a plate of cooked food. I feel like this has made me not just a better, but a truly happier mom."
